Under Pressure

New York´s, if not America´s spiritual center is the original Nathan´s Famous, Coney Island. It´s the site of Joey Chestnut´s recent Fourth of July Hot Dog Eating Contest success - sixty-eight hot dogs in ten minutes. The event represents the spirit, of competition, bravery and consumption, that built a superpower. It is, though, unfortunate that the ever-present ugly side of American sports and culture has tarred the event with the unpleasantness that lead to the recent exclusions of Kobayashi-san.

Having stopped for sweet and sour chicken in China Town two hours ago, I'm in a rare phase of my game where there is food available, but I don´t want to eat it. But I do want a Nathan´s Famous t-shirt, so I can start to design my here-I-am-rock-you-like-a-hurricane-New-York-look. But, how could I possibly wear such an item without having eaten here. I´d either have to leave the t-shirt, or know, everytime I pulled it on, that it´s a lie - a lie and a deception. I ask myself, what would Kobayashi-san do in this situation? The answer is very obvious. I must eat.

The hot dog is light work, but I've also taken the french fries with cheese - because Joey would, and because Kobayashi-san would. As I watch the girl depress the plunger that projects a cheese - a cheese that could never be spawned by nature - from a metal nozzle, I know I'm in a spot of bother. I battle through the foul, bright yellow, viscous "cheese" and almost equally unpleasant french fries with my eyes on the prize - my t-shirt.

I very gingerly toddle back to the subway, remembering this sensation from the Uruguay incident. But, the unsettling pressure in and around my stomach is more than countered by the knowledge of my of heroism and triumph in the face of adversity - not to mention my beautiful t-shirt. Only now can I begin to understand what it takes to be a champion.

Photo: arthurkade.com